~Woke up with morning with the intention to die. Make my final arrangements and say my good byes. No one will notice or even care. Most are here and still really don’t know. Closed all the bills I knew would be due. Took out the money and hid it in a shoe. Picked out my clothes to be put on at the morgue. Last step left is to bring my death on. How will I check out I haven’t decided? What will be my method to slowly do my time in?
Before I could take a few moments to myself, the phone rings and I had to quickly contain myself. Answer the phone with a bright cheery voice to find out it’s u and u needed my help. With tears in your voice and a whine in your breath, I had to go meet u and put off my death.
Raced to the place where u said u would be to find u sitting under a tree. Knelt beside u and u took my hand, and place the gun down with the trigger hand. My eyes quickly widened, and I didn’t know what to do. I was confused and conflicted about what u were going through. I knew my reasons for wanting to meet death but to see u this way gave me complete dread. How could I help u when I felt the same? Was this all happening to stop me from being deranged?
We sat and talked for hours on end and in one quick moment u gave me your hand. The hand with the trigger, holding on to the gun which was put down and silenced with nowhere to run. I stole deaths moment away from u. I stopped u from doing something I knew I shouldn’t do. U showed me this moment inside of my mind, to stop me from making a mistake being blind.
U showed me I was more then I realized and taught me to carry someone else’s pride. I held u close, so u would never feel alone and we hold tight to these moments when we’re locked up alone.